It was never going to be easy.
Ministry.
Don't get me wrong, there are times of great reward, joy and favour.
I'm not going to lie to you though.
There are times of extreme dryness, where one feels alone and abandoned.
My scripture this morning is important to me right now.
Psalm 63:1
(A Psalm of David, when he was in the desert of Judah) You, God, are my God. Earnestly I seek you; I thirst for you, my whole being longs for you, in a dry and parched land. where there is no water.
A desert.
Hot.
Dry.
Devoid of any useful living thing.
No water.
I honestly have felt that lately. I didn't want to plant another prayer centre. Before we moved to London I dreamed of not doing any planting or Corps work in the Salvation Army at this stage of my officership. I am tired of the hard work of planting into dry, parched land, and genuinely am ready for a different type of challenge. I can't see myself overseeing a corps at this stage either. Both Dawn and I were ready to lay the vision we have carried down for others to pick up and carry forward. In my spirit I know I am ready for a change in my leadership direction.
That is what Gary feels and desires.
Yet.
I am here.
Planting the third prayer centre of my officership.
And.
It has been the hardest yet.
We came to a dry, parched, land.
A genuine spiritual desert.
And yet.
Dawn and I, despite the Salvation Army not listening to us in terms of our readiness to grasp a hold of a new role and new things in leadership, and listen, i'm not knocking them (The SA) for that as I believe others definitely listen to God too, It's not just about Gary and Dawn! We were nevertheless able to stand in that dry land and say You, God, are my God.
And.
As we declared that and continue to earnestly seek him, as we thirst for him, he has began to rain down his living water on the dry ground here in Ealing.
Despite what Gary and Dawn might want, what God wants doesn't always line up with that.
We have been blessed here with some lovely people, who have joined us since the Corps has been realigned a little, people who have helped us to lay down a new direction, without them we couldn't have got to where we are right now, which is a little way down a journey that hopefully will now span decades. They are infectious and loving and have been like a refreshing rain in the dryness. We have been blessed by seeing the start of some serious transformation happening in peoples lives and that is the sensational love of God at work. We have seen the seeds of unity springing in the togetherness of the churches here in Ealing. Ive seen healing and restoration going on right here, right now.
This is water.
Living water.
Beginning to seep into the dry, parched land.
The thing is.
Even though I am tired of this type of ministry and probably do need at some stage to move into something different, God is still working. God is still moving. God is still carrying out His massive life saving plan on this earth. Despite what I feel or whether I am enjoying my ministry or not, he continues to astonish us with his gift of love to this world.
And.
I have to believe he can use us right here, right now.
Despite my feeling.
Despite my feelings of needing a change.
God is always on the mission.
The key is?
Listen to Davids declaration in the Judah desert.
"You, God, are my God!!!
When we can say that with confidence, or even if we can say it when we are not feeling that confident, even when stuff around is not seemingly happening, then we have a chance!
Because God is the living water!
He is the refreshing rain.
He is our hope.
He is our sustenance in a dry, parched land.
Hey Gary why are you speaking like this on your blog I possibly hear you say?
Yeah.
Because?
This morning as I prayed alone in a very quiet upper prayer room. I reflected on this scripture. I stayed with it.
I had a picture, it could have been me, but I don't think it was, I saw someone in a very empty room sitting on a chair with their head in their hands.
There was a perspex shield on the window.
Outside there was an golden city gleaming in the distance.
It was etched on this persons face the longing to head towards that new place.
I felt the loneliness and the pain of this person who longed to head towards this city. But the perspex was strong and the door of the room was locked and there was a feeling of complete trappedness in the air. The spirit of God whispered into the air that that the key to unlocking the door was the declaration. You, God, are my God! The declaration was freedom itself.
And I felt God say, "I need you to write this down Gaz"
It may well be there is someone out there who is feeling trapped by circumstance. There maybe someone who feels they are living in a dry land and feel so thirsty that you feel like you could die. There maybe someone who feels they are not being listened to? or that they are in the wrong job, the wrong place, the wrong relationship, the wrong ministry? There maybe someone who feels so far from God or vice versa, that the spiritual dryness is suffocating you.
God is always there!
Stand with me now and say this.
You God, are my God!
He is right there.
Living water.
The cool water of hope.
The refreshing water of life.
The sustaining water of God.
No matter how dry you are, no matter how devoid of blessing you feel, then cling to God.
Hold on with all your strength.
Hold on.
Hold on to the movement of God.
Earnestly seek him.
He will give us the desires of our hearts if we would only hold on to him.
Blessings. (Hope this helps someone today!)
Gaz
Ministry.
Don't get me wrong, there are times of great reward, joy and favour.
I'm not going to lie to you though.
There are times of extreme dryness, where one feels alone and abandoned.
My scripture this morning is important to me right now.
Psalm 63:1
(A Psalm of David, when he was in the desert of Judah) You, God, are my God. Earnestly I seek you; I thirst for you, my whole being longs for you, in a dry and parched land. where there is no water.
A desert.
Hot.
Dry.
Devoid of any useful living thing.
No water.
I honestly have felt that lately. I didn't want to plant another prayer centre. Before we moved to London I dreamed of not doing any planting or Corps work in the Salvation Army at this stage of my officership. I am tired of the hard work of planting into dry, parched land, and genuinely am ready for a different type of challenge. I can't see myself overseeing a corps at this stage either. Both Dawn and I were ready to lay the vision we have carried down for others to pick up and carry forward. In my spirit I know I am ready for a change in my leadership direction.
That is what Gary feels and desires.
Yet.
I am here.
Planting the third prayer centre of my officership.
And.
It has been the hardest yet.
We came to a dry, parched, land.
A genuine spiritual desert.
And yet.
Dawn and I, despite the Salvation Army not listening to us in terms of our readiness to grasp a hold of a new role and new things in leadership, and listen, i'm not knocking them (The SA) for that as I believe others definitely listen to God too, It's not just about Gary and Dawn! We were nevertheless able to stand in that dry land and say You, God, are my God.
And.
As we declared that and continue to earnestly seek him, as we thirst for him, he has began to rain down his living water on the dry ground here in Ealing.
Despite what Gary and Dawn might want, what God wants doesn't always line up with that.
We have been blessed here with some lovely people, who have joined us since the Corps has been realigned a little, people who have helped us to lay down a new direction, without them we couldn't have got to where we are right now, which is a little way down a journey that hopefully will now span decades. They are infectious and loving and have been like a refreshing rain in the dryness. We have been blessed by seeing the start of some serious transformation happening in peoples lives and that is the sensational love of God at work. We have seen the seeds of unity springing in the togetherness of the churches here in Ealing. Ive seen healing and restoration going on right here, right now.
This is water.
Living water.
Beginning to seep into the dry, parched land.
The thing is.
Even though I am tired of this type of ministry and probably do need at some stage to move into something different, God is still working. God is still moving. God is still carrying out His massive life saving plan on this earth. Despite what I feel or whether I am enjoying my ministry or not, he continues to astonish us with his gift of love to this world.
And.
I have to believe he can use us right here, right now.
Despite my feeling.
Despite my feelings of needing a change.
God is always on the mission.
The key is?
Listen to Davids declaration in the Judah desert.
"You, God, are my God!!!
When we can say that with confidence, or even if we can say it when we are not feeling that confident, even when stuff around is not seemingly happening, then we have a chance!
Because God is the living water!
He is the refreshing rain.
He is our hope.
He is our sustenance in a dry, parched land.
Hey Gary why are you speaking like this on your blog I possibly hear you say?
Yeah.
Because?
This morning as I prayed alone in a very quiet upper prayer room. I reflected on this scripture. I stayed with it.
I had a picture, it could have been me, but I don't think it was, I saw someone in a very empty room sitting on a chair with their head in their hands.
There was a perspex shield on the window.
Outside there was an golden city gleaming in the distance.
It was etched on this persons face the longing to head towards that new place.
I felt the loneliness and the pain of this person who longed to head towards this city. But the perspex was strong and the door of the room was locked and there was a feeling of complete trappedness in the air. The spirit of God whispered into the air that that the key to unlocking the door was the declaration. You, God, are my God! The declaration was freedom itself.
And I felt God say, "I need you to write this down Gaz"
It may well be there is someone out there who is feeling trapped by circumstance. There maybe someone who feels they are living in a dry land and feel so thirsty that you feel like you could die. There maybe someone who feels they are not being listened to? or that they are in the wrong job, the wrong place, the wrong relationship, the wrong ministry? There maybe someone who feels so far from God or vice versa, that the spiritual dryness is suffocating you.
God is always there!
Stand with me now and say this.
You God, are my God!
He is right there.
Living water.
The cool water of hope.
The refreshing water of life.
The sustaining water of God.
No matter how dry you are, no matter how devoid of blessing you feel, then cling to God.
Hold on with all your strength.
Hold on.
Hold on to the movement of God.
Earnestly seek him.
He will give us the desires of our hearts if we would only hold on to him.
Blessings. (Hope this helps someone today!)
Gaz
